A whole new perspective

I'm not sure what has happened with my new focus on regulating emotions. I feel a lot calmer and my head doesn't feel so overwhelmed. I think I was honestly going overboard with so many distress tolerance skills I didn't give myself time to just relax. I still swear by them but it is interesting to note the difference in being mindful of regulating emotions than constantly trying to distract myself, which has been resulting in suppression. I am not getting too excited though because I haven't had any negative emotions the last 3 days and I am almost positive that when I do I will struggle to do the skills that I am working hard on using this week. Though as time goes on I will hope to pull these skills out easily and use them in times of labile emotions. 

I received some fantastic tips from my case manager 2 days ago. I told her that I can't seem to observe and describe my emotions easily because I have a hard time picking which came first when I experience all different emotions in one hit. She could tell it was really bugging me to the point of being overwhelmed and advised that perhaps I could just choose the one that stood out the most in order to just work on that one emotion. The other tip she gave me is to write them all out on the separate worksheets (which you are meant to do) and not label which came 1st, 2nd, 3rd. It seems so silly but I have been so hung up on what came where, when that happened and how that came next, that I have lost sight of just working on any emotion that came. She said that perhaps by focusing on one, the others may come easier or I may even discover which came first. The most important thing that matters is that by working on one and radically accepting one emotion I would suppress less. So this is what I will be doing next time I need to fill out an observe and describe worksheet. I look forward to it. 

Yesterday when I was trying to think of positive experiences I could have, (a skill that is part of Emotion Regulation), I looked at a list that I got from my DBT class, written by Dr Marsha Linehan. It is surprising how even the tiniest thing can be considered as increasing positive emotions. I chose a few that I enjoy doing:

 Having quiet evenings

 Laying in the sun

 Imaging beautiful scenery

 Singing around the house

 Coming home from work

 Doodling

 Laughing

The list isn't scary (that's only a fraction of things to do out of a list of 176). It would be scary if it was climb a mountain or visit Africa but things like saving money and doodling is an achievable thing to start with and it can increase to harder things as confidence is built. It excites me to think of doing things to increase positive emotions.